I cannot think of a better day to begin writing on my blog
than today; today is Akha Teej, the auspicious day of beginnings, one of the
four holy days of the Hindu calendar. So
let me begin by wishing my readers good beginnings in all they start today!
It has been four months since I began my “new” job.
Followers of this space might remember that I was heart-broken at losing my
previous job of 17 years. Actually, I was so heart-broken, that I stopped
looking for full-time faculty positions altogether. The one I’d lost was the
perfect faculty job, I had done it well, and I was fortunate enough to lose it
before it soured or got old. I had my perfect job, and I had enjoyed it for
over a decade and half. I remain grateful, and yes, Reader, a part of my heart
still yearns for it. I fear it always will.
Now, I coordinate the Writing Center at one of the campuses
of my county’s college. It is a job that demands completely separate skill sets
than the ones I had been using all my adult life. Much to my surprise and
delight, I am loving it! I never expected to be happy as a manager of sorts,
but I learn something new every day, and another piece of a large puzzle falls
in place, giving me a whole new perspective on the landscape of an educational
institution, a landscape I’d thought I knew well, too well. I have also taught at
this college briefly and now that I see this side of process, I will never be
the same again.
Yes, clocking in 40 hours a week feels just as strange as
not having to work at home, both to me and my feline roommates. But it is
growing on us. I knew that in an alternate life, I’d be running a Writing
Center; now I really am doing it! Of course, my vision for a Writing Center was
very different from this very real one. But as days go by, this vision becomes
more focused, more possible. One day, the gods willing, I will have the Writing
Center of my imagination. Of course, a lot of credit for my loving my new job
goes to the people I work with, my supervisors, colleagues, and staff, who are
all warm and helpful. Besides that, however, the work itself is new and
challenging.
I did not mean to only sing accolades to my two jobs, though
this entry seems to primarily do that. I hope that my Reader takes heart from
my story; if something that seems apocalyptic happens and everything ends,
there is still the grain of the coming morrow contained within; one only has to
believe in the inexorability of the heartbeat and breath. They keep rhythm with
the march towards future seasons.
According to Hindu myth, today, one of the seven immortals,
Ved Vyas began The Mahabharata. I
want to keep the messages it embodies in my mind today. I want to be courageous
enough one day to be able to trust in the impermanent, malleable nature of all
realities, and still recognize the grain of a beginning in all endings. I have
written from the perspective of Satyavati, Ved Vyas’ mother, and I will keep
her ability to adapt and her insistence on sculpting the ways in which she
adapts.
And no matter how frightening it is, I will be brave enough
to put one foot in front of the other and trust the Earth to hold it steady.
